Pride and Prejudice

No, I am not talking about the classic novel. Truth be told, I never read it.

I am talking about my experiences on different Face Book Discussion Groups. I have joined a few, mainly to get my name “out there” to generate interest in this ministry, my website, and (maybe?) sell a book or two. So far it has been more painful than useful.

I have been a member of one group that was supposed to be about the Torah, but instead ended up being all about Kabbalah and Talmud, almost totally Rabbinical-based. I was also on one that was titled in a way that made you think it had Messianic Jews and Messianic Christians in it, but that was not so, either.

In both these different groups I found opinions that were anywhere from banal to heretical, and it seems that 20% of the people in the group (based on the numbers of members) did 80% of the posting.

And much of what was posted was, at least for me, useless. I saw posts that were nothing more than a “copy and paste” from the bible, verse upon verse, different verses from different books tied together in a continuous diatribe, with no message, no drash- just copy and paste. Some people did find something edifying in those posts, so it did serve a purpose for some, but to me that is just a topographical, empty spiritual experience. I don’t need to be in a discussion group to read bible verses.

The real problem is the pridefulness I see in the members of these groups that makes them prejudice towards anyone that disagrees with them. I have seen abusive, degrading and distasteful language used against someone who just disagrees. I have been the butt of this, myself. I mentioned how I felt about the Zohar, the “bible” of Kabbalah on one site, and I was accused of being in league with HaSatan because by my not wanting to read it I was being willfully ignorant, which is a sin and therefor in league with the Devil.

Really? Not wanting to read something that I was taught Judaism (and this was supposedly a Torah based site) has historically considered heretical because I don’t want to expose myself to it, makes me a demon? This one person went as far as to say that Yeshua (Jesus) was Kabbalah and taught from that.  The Chasidic and Orthodox Jews believe Kabbalah was first introduced at Sinai and was part of the Oral Torah, which has become the Talmud. In other sources the origin of Kabbalah is 12th to 13th Century in Spain.

The point is not what Kabbalah is or isn’t, but that when someone disagrees with you and you find yourself attacking the person instead of the argument, then your pride has taken over and you’re showing signs of prejudice. The anger and frustration you feel is causing you to become aggressive and impolite, and that is directly from pridefulness.

When we recommend something, or suggest a way to do something, if the person we give that suggestion to decides not to do it, many of us feel that we have been insulted. “You asked me, and I told you- so why won’t you do it?” is the feeling we have. We forget it is very likely that what we suggested is not a good suggestion; maybe it isn’t right, or maybe the person knows that it is a good suggestion, but there are other factors we don’t know about (which the person does) which render the suggestion as inappropriate. If nothing else, when someone asks for an idea or suggestion that doesn’t mean they have to do what is suggested. It is not personal, it is not because they don’t like you or think less of you, it is just that they decided they don’t want to do what was suggested. They have that right.

So, when I said I didn’t want to read the Zohar because of what I had been taught about it, why did I have to be called “willfully ignorant”, or be told that I am in league with Satan, or that I am unable to make up my own mind and am “easily swayed”? Why?- because the people who I was having this discussion with are so prideful and defensive of their own beliefs that they have to attack and demean anyone who doesn’t agree with them.

And this wasn’t any one group- I have been in (and out) of about 5 groups, of which (so far) only two have been representative of what I would expect from a God-fearing group of people who believe in Yeshua, or are (for lack of a better term) “Christian” in their approach to people. And when I use the term “Christian” I mean what we would want “Christian” to mean.

So, now that that’s off my chest, what is the value of this little rant of mine? It is to remind everyone, including myself, that when we talk about God, Yeshua or the bible, we are representing that topic. In other words, if I say I believe in Yeshua and am talking with another person who doesn’t, when they disagree with me and I start to brow-beat them, call them insulting names and tell them they are doomed for hell and eternal destruction, what kind of image will that leave them about all Believers? I think we can agree that their perception of someone who is “Christian” or “Messianic” will not be a good one. When we talk about God, no matter how adamant the other person is in their opinion, let them be the one that is out of control and wildly defensive. Let them be the one to attack you and call you names or infer your lack of strength or wisdom. Let them be the one who leaves a bad taste in the mouth of all listening. In the meantime, you be compassionate, respectful and patient. If they become abusive, politely ask them to not attack you personally and stay on the topic. If they can’t, then politely excuse yourself. Let everyone who is listening see the peace and security you have in your belief- wildly defensive is saying I can’t be sure of what I am saying and anyone who doesn’t agree is weakening my faith, so I must destroy them. Quietly and calming explaining why you believe in something shows a deep and confident faith in the truth of what you are talking about.

We know who God is, we know who Yeshua is, and we know (or we should) from our experience with God and Yeshua that whether someone accepts or rejects, the truth is still the truth.  In the Trilogy of the Matrix, Morpheus talks about the prophecy of “The One.” His commanding officer says that not everyone believes as Morpheus does, to which Morpheus replies that his faith doesn’t require anyone else to believe as he does. Now that is a statement of faith!

So even if someone is bound for hell, just because it is the truth doesn’t mean you have to tell them- you certainly won’t gain anything from it with regards to changing their mind. And if someone is adamant God doesn’t exist, remember that they have a right to their opinion. God gave us all Free Will to choose or reject Him- you know God exists, so you don’t need their approval or agreement because God exists whether they believe it or not.

Too many people have a bad image of “Believers” because too many Believers have left that image with them by being so zealous that they actually do the opposite of what they want to do: instead of making people jealous of the peace the Ruach (Spirit) gives us and of the fearlessness we have knowing that God is on our side, they leave the impression that all “Bible-thumpers” are totally out of touch with reality, and the last thing anyone would want to do is become that way.

When we proclaim ourselves as followers of Messiah, everything we do and say is a reflection on Messiah. Everything. And when someone who has rejected God, and/or Yeshua , sees us act in a poor fashion, they will use that as a reason to continue to reject God and His Messiah. So instead of saving a soul, we are contributing to their death.

Think about that the next time you are in a discussion with someone trying to win their soul for Messiah.

Being Correct Doesn’t Make You Right

One of the nicest slaps in the face I ever received was from Jim McGovern, one of the better bosses I have been blessed to work for. He told me that what I say to people is usually right, but I say it the wrong way.

That’s an important lesson for all of us.

I read this morning in Dear Abby about a woman whose uncle is (apparently) a person who believes in the Bible and what it says. However, at a gay marriage he was invited to (and he went?) he screamed out while the men were walking down the aisle that his bible says Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve. He has also been very vocal (and impolite) at other occasions. She went on to say he was divorced three times already and on his 4th marriage, and by now I understood this person, and the way he was expressing biblical truths, was not using God’s word to honor God; in fact, he was dishonoring God by his actions.

Being a God-fearing, Bible-loving Believer is great! But ramming it down someone else’s throat doesn’t bring any glory or honor to God. Just the opposite- it dishonors Him, and will drive people away from the Lord instead of bringing them to Him. We need to show the word of God in the proper light- by being a living example of the love, compassion and forgiveness that God showed to us, and that Yeshua showed, as well.

I don’t believe that homosexuality is a correct way to be- it is a sin. So is lying, so is adultery, so is stealing, so is murder, so is gossip. To God, sin = sin. There is no sin>sin or sin<sin: sin=sin=sin. It is all the same to God, any one sin is just as bad as many sins, and it only takes one sin to separate us from the Lord.

By God’s grace and love, every sin is forgivable. Through Yeshua’s sacrifice, every one of us can be forgiven, and saved eternally from ourselves.

I have dear family members, on my side and Donna’s, that are gay. I love them, I visit them and love it when they visit me. I don’t ram down their throats what I think because I am just as much as sinner as they are- we are all in the same boat, we are all sinners, we are all in need of the salvation of God available through Yeshua ha Mashiach.

We should be allowed to voice our opinions but we need to respect the rights of others to make their own choices in life. We will all be before the Lord, sooner or later, and He is the final judge. God, and God alone, is the ultimate, final and only fair and just judge that is, was, or ever will be. And that is because He can see the heart, whereas we humans can barely see the nose on our face.

Hate the sin and love the sinner- we say it, we hear it, but do you live it? If you are the one who says what is right but says it the wrong way, the bottom line is that you are wrong. I am one who knows- I am the rightest wrong person you will ever meet. I am an old pro at being right the wrong way, and when you drive people away or hurt their feelings saying the right things, you are wrong.

Why? Because when you plant a seed you need to sow it gently. By shoving the truth down someone’s throat you are sowing seed then stomping on it, then kicking it, then stomping on it again.

Ain’t gonna get no harvest that way!

People don’t mean what they say, they mean what they do– the man described above may say he believes in the bible, but what he does says he is just a self-righteous, judgmental person who is using God’s word as his excuse to berate others and voice his own opinion. He isn’t giving honor or glory to God, he is only proving he is a “holier-than-thou” you-know-what.

If we are really God-fearing, and we really believe in the bible, and we really want to show others the truth and love of God, and we really want to bring others to salvation, we really won’t do it by preaching how wrong they are and insulting them. That won’t win people over to God because when you insult people all you do is force them to become defensive. Besides that, another truism I have learned from being in sales is that people only believe half of what you say, but 100% of what they say, so no matter what you say or how correctly you say it, they still won’t really believe you. They will, however, notice how you live, how you act towards them, and how you treat others.

If you want to win people over to God, don’t tell then how they should act: show them.